Odd

I have oodles of pictures stored on my laptop, and, as with things in the house, I'm learning to get rid of some. Time this evening was spent cropping, shrinking and deleting. It was good. How many slightly different poses of the same person does one need? PICK ONE! And keep it. Dash the rest.

A week ago, my father was standing outside as he awaited an upcoming meeting. I flitted about with my digicam, and his expressions were a mix of business (to go with his attire) and paternal patience.

Cropping those pictures this evening, I found myself thinking, "What would they want for an obituary pic? Better not shrink that one too much..."

When I finally realized my thoughts, I quickly closed the photo editing program.

What?

My dad's 65, a bit pudgy but trimming down in his retirement years, and has a few unidentifiable lesions on his arms. Hopefully, he's got a number of good years left in him. I'd like him to meet my husband and children (of course, I'd like to meet them, too).

When he goes kayaking alone, I tell him to be careful. He shrugs and smiles. We've had this conversation before. He doesn't want a hospital death, like he watched his mother endure. If he has a heart attack in his kayak, I'm sure he'll be happiest going that way.

Personally, I'd like the chance to say goodbye. However, I see merit in his mindset. To just be gone; to go while the going is good...